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Obviously the Beer Gives Him Super-Powers

This is retarded:

“Then we come back off the elevator and that’s when, for whatever reason … I decided to take off running,” Hanson said. “I don’t know why I took off running or what really led up to it, but — I did.”

Sprinting down the hallway alone, he said he was confused by the reflection on the window pane at the end. With a crash, the 275-pound former prep football player and wrestler broke through a double-paned window with a safety bar.

The fall has made him more contemplative and given him a fresh perspective, he said, though he didn’t know whether it would cause him to drink less.

I’m pretty sure that what happened here is he attacked his reflection.

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